I walked past the store the other day and my eyes instantly were attracted to the sexy lingerie hanging in the window. For a brief moment, I imagined what it would be like to be wearing that outfit. And yet, I didn’t walk in to even try it on.

We have been so conditioned as women to so many different views and issues regarding our sexuality. Firstly, often it is through the male gaze. How will my partner feel seeing me in this? What will his reaction be? Will I be sexier? Like wearing an outfit will do all of that. And then I went to, where would I wear it? And will it be practical? Could I pull it off? That model isn’t my body shape and size so it wont look good on me. And I caught myself falling into this systemic view of lingerie. This constant battle between wearing it for myself or doing it for a partner and ultimately judgement. From him, me, society, everyone. I know, having spoken to many women that I am not alone on this. But here is what I really do believe as cliché as it sounds. Our bodies are all beautiful. At every stage of life. Regardless of our size, shape, marks, scars, stretching. All of it. Just beautiful. We have to change our mindset, we have to stop thinking “in a few months when…” and start embracing the now. And lingerie is an amazing way to do that. Of course, it is important to find the right shape and style that compliments your body. Please re-read that sentence and focus on “compliments”. Not hides, not detracts but compliments. If you are a DDD bust size, find specialist stores that stock brands that cater for YOU. They exist. Many of them in fact. And they are all waiting for you to feel like a sexy goddess in them. But here is the thing, once you have found the right style, shape and size for you – there is little more empowering than knowing what lies beneath. Your little secret, your weapon. Something that makes you feel confident and sexy and powerful. Putting on some sexy undies underneath your regular clothes can help you feel like you have a naughty little secret. And it actually isn’t about anyone else but you. Confidence is sexy. Loving your body is sexy. Flaunting what you have is sexy. And none of it cares about what size that comes in.

So why am I writing this. Well, I often get asked how to get back in the mood. How to feel good. And these are really important and common concerns for many women. As crazy as it may sound, lingerie is actually a great step forward. It can really help accentuate your body. It can help you feel more confident. Now if you can do that all on your own and this doesn’t work for you, no problem at all. But if you need to try a little something and you are looking for a way to get in touch with your body and your sexy side, then I would advocate a thousand times over for investing in some amazing lingerie. And there are sooo many brands. And so many women continually innovating in this space.

So here’s my advice. Take the plunge, buy something sexy, put it on, feel good, look good, love yourself and then take your sex to the next level. I can promise you, feeling good and confident about you will be a great step forward in your sexual happiness.

 

Lara xx